I haven't blogged in quite a long while. Not sure why...well maybe I am. I have been frustrated. Frustrated and angry with life and with what Beast and I have or for lack of a better way to put it, have NOT been doing. We have fallen back into old habits, not engaging in actively trying to create a good power exchange and I have been depressed about it. Beast is NOT a dominate by nature. Let me say that another way. He is not a dominate in the way that most would see. I see it, sometimes, glimpses of the man that I need. It kills me when I see him dominating a room, commanding in his quiet way.
I'm just beyond frustrated and I don't know if I will ever recover. We celebrated 18 years yesterday. I'm trying to figure out how to handle what's happening. It weighs heavy, so very heavy. This kind of stress takes a toll on the body too. Not a good time of year to be feeling like this.
Praying for a better new year. Will keep on posting just to hear myself think.
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